Dear Zindagi…
First I do apologize for referring to you as Zindagi instead of the O!Jeevave as I refer to you in my night conversation.
Somewhere it has become fashionable to say, “life sucks” we are brought up with a social conditioning of “hardships, poverty and being serious” is about life and living… one actually felt guilty about laughing, laughing meant I was frivolous, or more interestingly it meant I was unintelligent.
Walking in the rain, or talking to the poor fisherwoman at the corner of the street meant that you had no better work to do, and that translated to incapable or unambitious neither looked were qualities to be imbibed.
The journey on this tedious solemn path can be draining. Until I realized I had to break the tyranny of words, for the words created the image. How beautiful life is each stage letting us discover just a little bit of ourselves, by the end of the journey the learning is quite interesting.
As child the joy of the rains, the fascination of the thunder, the warmth of bonding between siblings, cousins and innumerable relatives. Then there is the this amazing thrill in discovery. The world with its wonderful animals, birds, plants, leaves, fruits and flowers it is amazing.
When I began my journey towards the light, and to heal the first thing that I had to learn was to change my conversation with you, Zindagi, I had stop all those complaints, I had to acknowledge the hurt but not dwell on it, it meant I had to grow out of feeling sorry for myself.
Each day I wrote 5 things I was grateful for and guess what suddenly I realized that there was so much joy in it. Though I wonder why is it that we find it so difficult to remember and acknowledge happiness. Is it because hurt leaves a scar… happiness does not… maybe the scar not about healing the hurt but reminding us that we are healed, so rejoice.
Zindagi.. have I thanked you for the wonderful people you put in my life? Who have given me the honour of being in their space, as they taught me, as they lead me, sometimes they let me lend them my energy so that they could move on? I used to think of it as being used, and feel belittled until I realized that each person in my life was just where they had to be doing just what they had to do, it was for me to flow with or against.
Another aspect of life that social etiquette and education sucks out is the ability to roar with laughter. The genuine mirth that emerges, that was the next step in my healing. Once I learnt to be thank full for the people, and energies and learning in my space, I decided to acknowledge the amusing things each day the first fifteen days were really bad, until I eventually learnt that I had given up laughing, the capacity to be what is called silly, and adulthood did not exclude silliness what adulthood excluded was thoughtlessness.
Actually there is so much I want to say, to appreciate all the beautiful things in life that you bring, and how honoured I am to even be alive.
Thank You zindagi more tomorrow.
“I am writing a letter to life for the #DearZindagi activity at BlogAdda“.
I too want to say a lot to #Zindagi but somewhere between dreams and reality, everything else seems to submerge beneath heaps of practicality.
Loved your take. 🙂
Dipanwita, one biopsy, two accidents and three surgeries have taught me each minute is a bonus. 🙂