Well ever wondered what it is? Actually I have. like moments of kneading the dough always seems to find events that elicit revenge. Pounding the dough somehow seem to release the anger.
There are times when I get so angry with someone I actually imagine ways of seeking revenge for the hurt they’ve caused me, and the methods are so blood curlingly nasty. However somewhere along the way I realized that these thoughts were very energetic creations and rebalancing myself was tough. The only way I could do it was acknowledge the hurt and then release it to the universe with forgiveness. It is very difficult to do so. I also realized when someone did hurt me if I said its okay, then I was permitting the other person to hurt me again, if I could say this is the boundary that you do not cross then things are clear.
Before invensting into a negative thought or action, it became very necessary for me to remind myself that everything had a purpose. It was easier to release issues when I did not take them personally. I could look at every interaction as an opportunity to make a better choice. That meant I had to take a deep breathe, affirm to myself where I wanted the relationship to go, and then choose to respond in a way that I could connect to.
What is and was difficult is to release the baggage of old hurts I call them scars. But then achieving closures would help.
I had to be non judgemental about myself and others that was where the major catch was. But yes as I meet people before my scar days they seem to find me very non-judgemental which meant I just had to go back to what I was. I don’t get to play the victim.
These days however i have taken a page from Mary Higgins Clark when someone is mean to me, I just make them a victim in my next book.