Attitude Levied

citizen journalist
image courtsey internet

It is that time of the year, when my father was alive he would ask me to sign a sheet and I would do so, never bothering to know more.

Over the past five years of self healing, I learnt lot of things, the last year has been about learning to handle my belief about money. a

As i read about the invite to pledge to share, the prompt talks about citizen responsibility… which is what I shared in my blog it is  like a marketing piece that colgate or pepsodent would dole out, somehow it does not allow the reader to engage and take responsibility, of contribution.

Yes, I am citizen and citizenship carries responsibilities I know that, yet I have deferred filing it to the last minute. That I realize is because somehow money is something we are not comfortable dealing with we look at money as evil, when we are financially comfortable we tend to be apologetic about it. the only way out was to go into my fear and confront my greed, my weakness, my neediness, and the way out was through my mind by choosing my thoughts.

The minute I said I can’t afford it, my brain shut down my brain, it didn’t have time to think anymore beside it also brought up certain amount of sadness a helplessness that lead to despondency and often depression. But,”How can I afford it?” opened up the brain, forced me to think and search for answers. It also opened possibilities, excitement and dreams and created a stronger mind, and dynamic spirit. At the point the money hits our hands, we have the power to determine our financial future and we never know true freedom until you achieve financial freedom.

Then it came to taxes my attitude I was in total denial, like most social beliefs we imbibe, the attitude was taxes was the way the government swindled people, the past two days, I have just put myself into filing my taxes, the process was not only empowering, it gave me a sense of financial well being.  A random musing of where should the tax money really go,  https://parwatisingari.wordpress.com/2016/07/18/tad-taxing/  changed my attitude, when the taxes are paid I feel empowered.  Maybe if we visualized the tax flowing into various utility projects we will look at our taxes as investment instead of something that is being stolen from us.income tax

It is the universal law, whenever we feel short or in need of something, if we give what we want first, it will come back in buckets. That is true for money, a smile, love, friendship. I know it is often the last thing we may want to do, but it worked for me. I just trust that the principle of reciprocity is true and I give what I want.

I have pledged to pay my tax, for it is my investment towards making my own life comfortable. I have also pledged to be financially organized for that is empowering. The https://tax.hrblock.in/diy/?utm_source=aff1060&utm_medium=email&utm_term=&utm_content=&utm_campaign=2#/layout/income/salary is hugely helpful.

Please include the line, “I’m taking the #TaxPledge to file IT returns with the easy Income Tax efiling option from H&R Block at BlogAdda.

Understanding Belief systems.

vasco (2)Belief systems.

When people ask us what is hypnosis we try to explain that we are belief enhancers. By definition belief is – conviction of the truth of some statement or reality of some being or phenomenon especially when based on examination of evidence.

Mainstream psychology and related disciplines have traditionally treated belief as if it were the simplest form of mental representation and therefore one of the building blocks of conscious thought.

The concept of belief presumes a subject—a believer and an object – the proposition. So like other propositional attitudes belief implies the existence of mental states and intentionality. Both of which are hotly debated  topics in the philosophy of mind,whose foundations and relation to brain states are still controversial.

Beliefs are sometimes divided into core beliefs—that is what are actively thought about and dispositional beliefs—those that maybe ascribed to someone who has not thought about the issue.

There are some core belief that we all about ourselves, like probably I am good at math, men always cheat etc. etch. These are not just opinions, but they are belief. Belief are solid ideas stored in your subconscious ind, whether they were really true or not, you will believe in them as long as you hold them in your mind. belief gets stronger when evidence supports them and they become wearker when something appears to be contradicting with them.

When an idea constantly bypasses your conscious fillers straight to your subconscious mind it may turn into a belief. It could by the conscious filters in one of the ways

  • From a trusted source – like maybe your parents, you will accept what they say without doubt, and it would enhance and strengthen when others support it. if your parents kept telling you were fool or dumb you would group feeling inferior.
  • When the conscious mind gets distracted, like when you are totally concentrating on something, then the subconscious remains unguarded. Say you were watching a serial totally engrossed with the perils of Pamela, the commercial break get to bypass your conscious mind and directly work with the subconscious.
  • Hypnosis is another space where your conscious mind filters are turned off, so that the suggestions can go directly to your subconscious mind.

BELIEF SYSTEMS AND YOUR LIFE—

Belief systems are quite important in life it can control, create, and change your life. if there is a false belief, it is quite probable that we land up creating a self fulfilling prophecy to support it.

Beliefs that people harbour that they are failures, they are victims, can cause major issues. One way of dealing with this is to question your subconscious. Persistently another way is to go into a hypno-trance and relook at the belief form environment and reassess it as an adult.

 

To identify the core belief the ideal thing to do is to follow the emotions. There is tremendous pain in believing something negative about ourselves. but when something really hurts us, it is not the other, the other is just pulling a trigger, that confirms a belief that you have about yourself.

Hypnosis, like I said before, identifies this core belief that we carry about ourselves and help us to break the patterns that we create.

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Parental fears—breaking family ties that bind.

xammi-promiseWhen I went to get a past life regression done, no matter what I did I could not go into a past life, all that I could see was darkness, and experience tremendous fear.  Third time round when that happened,  I was training under Dr.Yuvraj Kapadia of EKAA,(http://ekaa.co.in} and guess what, the familiar black, the familiar fear and this time I went a step ahead, I went into foetal position.

Very carefully Dr.Kapadia guided me through the cord cutting technique we, use to release whatever belief that was generating the fear, after which Dr.Kapadia asked me if I was an unwanted baby, I knew I was not, my parents had gone for the blessings of the Subramanya temple, before I was conceived. My mother had desperately wanted a daughter which I biologically am..But…. yes she was terrified that she would lose the child, because some astrologer had told her something and more over she had lost a baby just before me!!

It was her fear that I was experiencing and the remnant foetal energy of the previous pregnancy that I was seeing.

Through our training this is what came across, many a times we come to this world carrying the fear from our parents, it is kind of passed down to us and lived through us. Almost as if the fear has a life of its own.

When we work with belief systems we notice that fear we harbour many times is not even based on our own experience. As we trace it back it is something that we have “inherited” from either parents or the environment.  Like a fear of lack of money, if this is not resolved by the time we came into the picture, presto… chances are high that we inherit the belief and fear of scarcity.  This fear could block our growth it also drives our money and success belief while in reality we have not really experienced this scarcity.

The parents do this deliberately, it could happen inadvertently or it could happen deliberately if parents are not really competent to share values, they would be doing so with all good intentions, which you may not make the same judgemental errors that they did.

What Dr.Kapadia taught us to do, was immaterial of the parents physical presence, he taught us to cut cords with the belief system. Sometimes have a talk with the parent about wanting to remove this fear, and amazingly parents are so co-operative when we want to let go of an obsolete belief, they are proud of our courage to move on. In the past one month with this technique I have seen two of my clients resolve longstanding issues.

Just a visual conversation, from adult child to adult parent and things begin to shift.  In my own space, I realized that more inner work I did with my dormant and latent fear, the more I could forgive, and move on. I hope I can translate this learning to my children though they are already young adults they are definitely stronger than I am.

Interestingly as I cut cords with the belief and fear I inherited I find my children being less limited by it.

The lesson was so simple, acknowledge, address and move on.

In the supporting role…

DSCN8069 In the Supporting role—

Doing our Best work in a supporting role.

right now I am experiencing the poor me, syndrome, the victim and I am superfluous, kind of feeling. I am letting myself wallow in it for may be another 6 hrs before I work it out of my system.

When I look around, sometimes I think life is like the rave music, some one are like conductors, some are soloists, yet their performance would be diminished unless, the orchestra accompanies them. the magical precision of percussion blending with string instruments, and vocalist creates the most beautiful music.  It might happen that we  may not all receive the same attention as another, but each one of our contribution has its own values.

Maybe each task we do with infusing it with our energy becomes a gift.  Each of our personalities and talents are suited to different roles of support.  Leaders and star performers support to others in their own way.  I realized when I have nurtured people the support me with their gift, the only thing I can do is do my part with humility and gratitude, learning the lessons that move us steadily toward our goals.

Maybe our gift becomes apt and beautiful, when we can be fully present in every job that we do, by bringing in fullness of our bodies, minds and spirits to the moment, we enhance the infusion to our gift of our talent and abilities, more so since it becomes a willing contribution. This probably attracts the right people and circumstances into our experience.

Maybe when we do things begrudgingly it limits the flow of our energy and closes us off from the good that is available to us in every situation. But by giving the best in us to make the world around us better, we open ourselves to receive the best from the universe in return.

Synchronicity,

Synchronicity,

folk art1Have you ever noticed that seemingly unrelated things suddenly seem to work into a pattern. There is no clear cut reason for this to happen. But this is synchronicity, — the simultaneous occurrences of events which appear significantly related but have no discernible casual connections.

At the landmark forum, I sitting next gentleman. When we were asked to form groups we did our group had 4 women and 2 men. We were asked to pick a buddy, everyone pivoted towards the youngest participant a 21yr. Bubbly boy. The gentleman next to me stepped back. At that moment it occurred to me that I should reach out, over the course I realized he was dealing with a wife who had attempted suicide, he was in my space so that I would not go there. That’s when it hit me right on the face, that there is synchronicity.

On the face of things events seem to be random occurrences and result of coincidences, but if we can listen to things carefully, we realize that the universe is listening to us, I mean the real inner us, and gently communicating with us. as we learn to pay attention to and link the things that occur on a daily basis can be a way for us to become attuned to the fact that most everything happens in our lives for a reason—despite the fact that they are not clear.

Once we notice, and acknowledge that things often go more smoothly than we can ever imagine, it allows us the skill to reflect on the patterns in our lives. Events that might not at first seem to be related to each others are indicators that the universe is working with us and not against us.

The idea of synchronicity, calls us to trust the fact that there is more to our lives than what we experience on a physical level. We need to willing to look more closely at the bigger picture, accepting and having confidence in the fact that there is more to our experience than what immediately meets the eye. Being open to synchronicity also means that we have to understand that our lives are filled with both positive and negative events. Once we can recognize that one event is neither more desirable nor better than the other—they all have an overall purpose in our lives – then we are truly ready to listen to the message the universe gives us.

There is definitely an everyday sort of magic—the inexplicable connectedness we sometimes experience with places, people, works of art and the like. The eerie appropriateness of moments of synchronicity, the whispered voice, the hidden presence when we think we’re alone. We are never alone; we are eternally connected with everyone.

We may not really be able to see everything thing in our lives as being synchronous, we can certainly use hindsight to be more aware of the universe guides us. this sense of wonder at the mysteries of the universe and the interconnectedness present in our lives will help us see our over always of being and will in turn make it easy to work more consciously towards our spiritual evolution.

“You are never alone. You are eternally connected with everyone.”
― Amit Ray

The step.

step backTaking a break from what you are doing—a new approach.

Sometimes it helps to step back.

There was this time when everything seemed like  that snake that bit its own tail. I was so distracted, not really accomplishing much. I was so into what was happening externally that my inner self went for a toss. Then I was forced to take a step back and connect to my inner self giving my mind, body and spirit the time needed to re-energize and heal.

Initially the break did seem as productive as I would have liked it to be, but a healthy hibernation period let me discover aspects of myself and my potential. I called it a date with myself, small things like going for a walk dancing whatever. I never realized how much I missed swimming until I pushed myself to swim. Gradually the general direction that I wanted to take in life became quite clear.

One of the sessions at the Landmark forum, my buddy Ravindra told me, “maybe you are not keeping in pace with your companions because you hear a different drummer. If you step to the music you hear, however measured or far way you might sync.” Wow that was profound. Coming to think of it, everything about prioritizing, taking stock and assessing before we go ahead. It is quite important to know when something has reached its end. closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters whatever we choose to call it what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life are over. This will be possible only when we step back and look for the blind spot.

In my case only when I could look at the blind spot, let it go, and forgive myself, the situation and understand that the situation was over i could not move forward.

The step back and assessment of the situation clinically, matching it with my goals was very essential.

My story is slowly killing me.

xammi tarot readerMy story – dying slowly

In the burns ward the more terminally ill ones would be heavily medicated. They would be in and out of lucidity voicing their inner truest stories. In absolute honesty they would spew out their frustration, anger, and resentment about their jobs, their immediate family  sometimes it is very painful for the immediate family to continue care giving. This is actually the story that they have built around themselves over the years.

We hear of great healthcare personals who suddenly fall ill, well that is the story they tell themselves, and put their own health on the back burner.

Death creeps inslowly, due to anger,frustration collected by running from one achievement to the other that are visible and displayable, each subsequent achievement supersizing the other. Forgetting other things in life.

If we were to write our lifestory, giving ourselves points from 0-5 on different areas of our lives like family, healthcare, fun, career, finance, physical, spiritual it would be very interesting what our honest stories are.

At our workshop which is a 12 weeks recovery group, most stories seem to focus on failures, and pin a cause for the failure

  • Addiction to phone call—translates not listening to one’s inner self
  • Lack of trust

these stories give rise to the fundamental theme that drives the story

  • It is a comepetitive cut throat world
  • If I won’t do it someone else will and he/she will get ahead of me in life.
  • At we have a roof on our heads and food to fill our stomes.
  • I don’t get family time during the week.
  • These facts of life and I should face them
  • I should be greatful for what I have.

Is should do this even if it kills me seems to be a great theme. At the Landmark Education forum our coaches kept telling us, we don’t change things, because changing is fixing, we transform things and to transform what is required is a new story.

Like there was this participant who could not exercise either in the morning or in the evening because it challenged his time space.  He did have a pocket where he could exercise in the afternoon, but it is considered irresponsible to do so in the work culture. At the end of the day his story was oh! I am working so much that I don’t time to exercise, on one hand he is frustrated, he also felt extremely good about himself for being the victim of the work place culture, his sotry allowed him to be the oppressed by a system.

On a week day I cannot eat with my family because we are all busy. Well in India we slightly better off, as we still have culture of family dinner together.

What we require here is to rewrite the story at the focus. As long as our focus allows us to be victims we are dying slowly.

“When you understand, that what you’re telling is just a story. It isn’t happening anymore. When you realize the story you’re telling is just words, when you can just crumble up and throw your past in the trashcan, then we’ll figure out who you’re going to be.”
Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters